I get SO pissed off at people who think Asperger's and/or other autism spectrum disorders are 'great' and 'a blessing' and so much better than being NeuroTypical.

Who the fuck is proud to be having a neuropsychological/ developmental disorder?

Hell, I'm not.

I hate my Asperger/HFA as much as I hate my Dyscalculia, because it holds me back, disables me to do things like normal people do, makes me an anxious wreck. If something unexpected happens (for example; people invite me to visit them in two days) I'm done for; I get aggressive, unreasonable and pathetically nervous and worst of all I need someone else to tell me that, because I can't even see it for myself.
I think humans are scary, unpredicable creatures, who should be avoided at all costs. I don't understand them and they don't understand me. People stopped asking me to join them at parties, because I cowered in corners because of the sensory overload.

Does that sound 'cool' to you?

I want to be cured and if I have to be the 'devil's advocate' to say it, so be it.

I actually needed to get that off of my chest ever since people gave McCain a hard time about his cure-autism-comment (of course his ignorance was still awful).

Now that the Germans have seriously ruined my relatively good mood, I'm being pissed off enough to give the rant I had earlier the full credit it deserves.

This morning I went to the studentdean again, because of the delay I have with the whole Methods mess. So we talked a bit and I cursed my brain again for causing me to have shit like dyscalculia and Asperger's and he told me not to worry blah, blah, that's stuff the studyadvisor normally does, not interesting. The real reason I was there is money. My study grants stop in august this year, which means no money to study anymore...
Because of my problems I can have an extra 12 months of study grants, though.

That's awesome really. I love how Dutch scholar system is giving all people a chance to study.

What was pissing me off however was the conversation I had with two corridormates yesterday.
Daan and Iris' parents pay for their studies, mine don't. I don't get any money from them.
Iris' parents pay her rent. Mine don't.
She also takes the fully available student loan. I do too, but on the contrary to her, my parents won't pay off the debt. Also, I need it to live, she has it as 'extra' money.

Now don't get me wrong; I don't blame my parents for not giving me any money, nor do I feel jealous. I actually feel kind of good about being financially indepented from my parents.

The problem is, Iris has this 'holier than thou' attitude about giving money to charity and is very snobbish about the fact that she has fancy designer clothes and Ipods and Iphones and whatnots and still has money to go have dinner in a fancy restaurant. Argh!!! No fucking surprise with daddy dearest handing you everything on a silver platter!

Here I am, hoping the studentdean will grant me the money to study an extra year with a valid reason, working my ass of to replace my camera that got stolen, while she and several others say:

'Oh the next two years I will travel and study abroad and then I'll see what I do, finishing my study or something, I don't now. My dad told me he'll pay for everything anyways.'

That just pisses me off. She's just messing around with money that can actually help people that don't have the luck to study or even eat, goddammit. And no, that 5 euro you donate every month to Unicef doesn't make you goddamn Mother Theresa.

There.

[/rant]